Day 18..Carole F*****g Baskin!

18 days.

18 days locked in a house with 3 tiny humans.

It's been an exciting week- we went on an adventure to the living room and beyond! I also caved and watched 'Tiger King' on Netflix- what a ride that was!! Just when you thought Americans couldn't get any crazier, along comes Joe Exotic and Carole Baskin. If you haven't checked it out already, and you fancy making yourself feel better about your own life- I would suggest giving it a watch!

Honestly I expected to have lost it, but we are doing better than I thought we would be by this point. The kids are all in relatively good spirits and I have to say I am extremely proud of how they are coping.

While we are all worried about losing our sanity during this long, long time behind closed doors with our darling children, I think we often forget just how hard all this is on them as well as us.

Just 2 weeks ago they were living in a life full of routine, getting up early, going to school, seeing their friends and teachers. Now they are stuck inside the house 24 hours a day, with a Mother who apparently has less of a clue how to do their maths homework than they do, and is developing an increasingly worrying wine habit.

It's actually been really uplifting to see how they have adapted. 2 weeks ago, getting them to play nicely together was an uphill struggle. There would almost always be 1 of them sat with me complaining that the other 2 would not let them join in. They would argue, and bicker, and generally do all the things that brothers and sisters do to make each others lives as difficult as possible.

Now, I get times where I actually feel redundant. We sit down every morning for breakfast together, and then they sit and do some of their school work if they feel like it. Then I am left to my own devices for a few hours while they build forts in the bedroom, run round the garden, play ball, and generally enjoy each others company.

I went to check on the boys a few nights ago and Loki was not in his bed, he had climbed in with his brother and gone to sleep- This would never have happened without Sam screaming the place down before. I really hope this continues long after Covid-19 is gone.

We've found a new appreciation for our garden, where usually I have to drag the kids kicking and screaming they are now loving any opportunity to get some fresh air, and soak up some vitamin D. We even rescued a bee, which I have counted as science class. We named him Buzz-Zee-Bee (After Buzz Lightyear of course). 

The kids have also enjoyed costing me a small fortune in Sky Movies. This weeks offerings were Frozen 2, full of catchy new Frozen songs that are now stuck on a loop in my head, and Trolls World Tour which cost me £15 to RENT for 48 hours. So naturally I made the kids watch it 4 times just to get my £15 worth.   

I finally convinced the boys to let me cut their hair- Sam dared me to shave his head, and since he isn't leaving the house for the foreseeable I went with it. Loki changed his mind last minute but still went much shorter than usual. I offered my hair dressing service to Sky- she politely declined. (Can't say I blame her) I may have to let lose on my own hair before long- who knows if this lock down goes on much longer I may go full Britney and shave my own head- (For the laughs) Something for you all to look forward to in the coming months...

It's not all been plain sailing of course- I have found myself crying into my pillow on more than 1 occasion as the reality of what is going on in the world sets in. When all this started in January, who would have predicted that the whole world would be put on hold for an unknown length of time. Friends, families, separated for what already feels like a lifetime. Its strange how even the friends and family that you rarely see seem that little further away. 

I am extremely thankful to the friends and family who call or text me day after day, adult conversation is definitely in short supply so every message, every call helps pull back those tiny pieces of my sanity, and stop me from toppling over the edge. I think most of you will know my struggles with anxiety and depression over the years and I am fighting hard not to fall back into the black abyss. 

Like many, my main coping mechanisms for dealing with my depression have been going out, just getting out of the house, making plans, and forcing myself to stick to them. I know some of my friends think I am mad for making plans through this time as we really do not know how long until life returns to anything that resembles normal. But making plans gives me something to focus on, something to look forward to, it gives me hope that life WILL return to normal at some point. I am terrified of going back to being the person who can't leave her own house, who is scared to walk out of her own front door. 

Right enough of that- happy thoughts from here on out!

I will leave you with this- my favourite picture from this week- Yes, they have been in their pj's ALL DAY, and no, I have no idea why Loki is holding a card reader...

Good friends send bread and milk- the best friends send WINE!

Hello again!

I thought I would update you all on the apocalypse day.. erm.. well honestly I lost track of days?

It could be day 8- it could actually be day 973.. who knows!!

No work or school has left me all over the place and wondering how long my sanity will hold out.

Despite numerous lectures on the importance of social distancing and not going to the shop every 5 minutes, my children do not understand the concept of rationing. People give me funny looks if I try and take 3 kids into the spar- and apparently being a single parent is frowned upon in the end of days.

Who knew?

Loki insists on helping himself to whatever food he can find. I spent 10 minutes cleaning the living room and went back to the kitchen where he tells me that I must
'Look in the cupboard'. So I do. 'Where did those penguins go Mum?'. He asks, then proceeds to run up the stairs while I stare in disbelief at the empty pack of penguins. When I finally caught up with him and asked where he had hidden them he pointed gingerly at his tummy. Yes ladies and gentlemen the little swine had in fact gobbled up 6 penguins in the space of about 7 minutes. No snacks for the rest of the day- which of course means much upset from the other 2. Give. Me. Strength.

We ventured out yesterday for the first time in 10 days, to pick up the click and collect order from a certain well known supermarket. It is the first time we have been out since all this lockdown madness began. The queue for said well known supermarket was ridiculous- people waiting 2 metres apart across the car park for an hour just to get in the door. I was so glad I could drive in collect my stuff and immediately leave! Or so I thought- being the only person at click and collect I thought we would be in and out in minutes- but that was not meant to be. I was greeted at my car window by a girl who obviously hadn't got the memo about social distancing. She then went off in search of my shopping.

20 minutes I waited in my boot for her to return. When she finally arrived with my shopping she announced that the top 2 rows of shopping on the left of the trolley were mine- and everything on the right. So what was below the 2 rows on the left I hear you ask- well that would be someone else's shopping. She then went back inside and left me to it. I debated pleading ignorance and taking the lot but of course I didn't. (Honest) But I did wonder how leaving that shopping with me was going to help the spread of Covid-19. If I did have it (which I am assuming I don't?) then I could have infected the lot? Now looking at my own shopping and wondering if it is actually covered in corona germs...*Runs off in search of Dettol*


I have to admit that where school work is concerned I have been a little slack- While Facebook is being filled with pictures and statuses about home schooling- My little angels have spent most of their days either playing in the garden, playing on video games, watching TV, or their favourite- Eating! We did take a break and bake some cakes a few days ago- and school work is there if/ when they want to do any. Sky has so far been the only 1 to take me up on that- and this was the result- Well she's not wrong!

You know what? This is an incredibly stressful time- and the kids are facing these huge changes, just as much, if not more so than the rest of us. They are away from their friends, classmates, teachers. Routine has gone out of the window and I will be damned if i'm going to start arguing with them over sitting down and doing some maths that honestly, I probably wouldn't be able to help them with anyway. There will be plenty of time for school when the apocalypse is over. Even if there isn't, the mental health of my kids is slightly more important than their ability to work out X if Y is Z and Z is a giraffe.. That is after all, what calculators are for!

So to all those parent shaming perfect Mums and Dads out there-(we all know at least 1 right?) Just do us all a favour for the next few weeks and FUCK OFF! No-one cares if little Henry can do long multiplication, or if darling Jane just penned an epic tale of triumph in the face of this deadly pandemic.

My kid put matching socks on today- alright Susan! That's a win in my book!

I joke of course- if you can hold your child's attention with school work without wanting to stab yourself in the eye with a pencil after 7 seconds then congratulations. (But its still not a competition).
If you got up at least once this week, and actually put clothes on then well done! If your child has survived a whole week of lockdown- You are doing great! Give yourself a pat on the back- and a very large glass of wine!

Speaking of wine- one of my lovely friends had wine and gin delivered to my house yesterday- so at least at the end of each stressful day, I can drown my sorrows. Its quite possible that I will emerge from my house at the end of all this a raging alcoholic, but I am embracing the madness and will worry about what happens later, when we are eventually allowed to leave our homes again-

Cheers Everyone!